Thoughts from a Nurtured Heart . . .
Thoughts from a Nurtured Heart . . .
Psychologist and author of Hardwiring Happiness, Rick Hanson, writes about the negativity bias that is part of our DNA. He suggests that negative experiences stick like Velcro and we respond more like Teflon to positive experiences. When you recognize a moment of negativity think of something positive and hold that thought (green grass, blue sky, a baby’s smile, a snow day, finding a lost item, etc.) for several breaths.
While you’re at it, make a list of small pleasures you can call up at a moment’s notice?
I can't recall the source of this scribble that resonates with my mantra...
What's your gut saying?
Trust yourself and remember baby steps!
What about Bob? Dir. Frank Oz. Prod. Laura Ziskin. By Tom Schulman. Perf. Bill Murray, Richard Dreyfuss, and Julie Hagerty. Buena Vista Pictures Distribution, Inc., 1991.
Sending loving kindness and a shout out to Celeste Elsey who reminds us the choice is ours!!
Shine from within, people!!
You are eye-popping awesome for reading this blog and for thinking about how you want to show up for kids. We are encouraged to make our recognitions authentic and energetically aligned. The eye-popping awesome toy in this video supported a change in my energy and vocabulary.
In 2008, when The Inner Wealth Initiative: An Educator’s Guide to the Nurtured Heart Approach by Tom Grove and Howard Glasser was fairly new, I laughed about some of the nutritiously rich alternatives I might use to replace the blandness of “thank you” and “good job” in response to positive behaviors. I scoffed, “When am I going to say, ‘You’re being eye-popping awesome!’ to a kid?”
After nearly 10 years, I can hear myself saying most of the things from this page of The Inner Wealth Initiative including, “eye-popping awesome”. Have fun with this list and allow what feels authentic to you to emerge in good time, perhaps with accompanying props.
Grove, Tom, Howard Glasser, and Melissa Lynn. Block. The Inner Wealth Initiative: The Nurtured Heart Approach for Educators. Tucson, AZ: Nurtured Heart Publications, 2007. Print.
≇ means NEITHER APPROXIMATELY NOR ACTUALLY EQUAL TO
Like the Nurtured Heart Approach, Mindfulness has a simplicity that is NEITHER APPROXIMATELY NOR ACTUALLY EQUAL TO easy. While the ideas are relatively simple to remember...
NHA: energy, intention, 3 Stands, no, yes and clear
Mindfulness: paying purposeful attention to this moment without judgment
...it’s not easy to change habits. So, we take baby steps and implement an idea or two at a time. And then, we recognize the heck out of ourselves privately, or in community, for our persistence, risk taking, effort and commitment, etc. While the rewards are many, it is not as easy as it sounds to implement the NHA or mindfulness.
Please forgive yourself for the mistakes and those times it could have gone better. Mindfulness practices promote awareness, patience, non-judgment and acceptance while also supporting the practice of NHA.
From Life Hack:
The word “hack” suggests there are short cuts. Again, simple doesn’t mean easy, but these ideas support the journey.
20 Simple Things You Can Do Daily To Become A Mindful Person
A Simpler Guide to Mindfulness for Beginners
Another introductory page:
Former Chiropractor, Dr. Karen Osburn identifies herself as a “Powerful Badass Mindset Coach for Women Who Want MORE.” I’ve listened to several of her podcasts between audiobooks.
Always on the listen and look out for ideas that resonate with the NHA, I appreciate Osburn’s reflections about how she interacts with her “spirited” six-year-old son.
According to Osburn, a “Listening For” is the frame that you have for somebody else, "the way you see and hear that person." NHA practitioners know that if you’re listening and looking for problem behaviors you will find them. Similarly, if you’re tuned into what’s right (perhaps originality, respect or focus) you can find it.
In podcast #194, Osburn reflects first on similarities she has with her son, Tyson. They are both passionate, physical, energetic, emotional and full of push back. Next, Osburn discusses how she stopped fighting Tyson's raw energy. She is now flipping her “Listen For” with Tyson from difficult, challenging and headed for trouble to brilliant, unique, amazing, determined, funny and fun.
Osburn also reflects on changing the quality of time she and her husband spend with Tyson. She feels more loving, more present and accepting of Tyson for who he is. As a result of focused effort to listen for and see Tyson’s greatness, she is seeing positive changes in her son.
Like Howard Glasser who encourages us to water the grass we want to grow, Karen Osburn invites us to change the frame and listen for greatness.
Karen Osburn Podcast #194: What is Your Listening For With the People in Your Life?
Consider the underlying energetic current of rescuing our children when they're stuck. While it may feel kind and loving, there may be other messages that are received. Reset, trust your child and energize the progress made instead of taking over.
By all means, when safety is a factor, you must rescue, otherwise use caution.
These words “relax, refresh, return” remind me to reset myself and to become aware of my body and my intentions before considering the offer of a reset to another person. In my early learning of the NHA, I struggled with the notion of reset in the classroom. I hadn’t yet considered relinquishing the myth of my control as a teacher. Since that time, reset has been reframed: “reset is a skill” or “reset is a gift.” Becoming aware of my resets and modeling self-regulation with its many iterations is part of the gift, part of the process.
The Thoughts from a Nurtured Heart blog includes ideas and perspectives encountered through intentional living. Posts include ideas that support NHA but are not necessarily explicit teachings of Howard Glasser. I've done my best to properly attribute ideas I borrow from others.